Daddy nights/ nights with the other parent

Daddy-nights or nights with the other partner

Compared to mothers, who automatically have a very close bond with the child through pregnancy and birth, fathers have to actively put in effort to build this bond.

It can often be difficult for fathers to see how the baby turns directly to the mother, especially when tired, hungry or thirsty, in pain or in need of comfort.

But, the more time dad spends with the baby from the beginning and gets involved in routines, the closer the bond with his child will become.

Many parents wonder when dads can take over nights or can start putting the child to bed. The answer is simple - as soon as it feels right for the family and everyone is comfortable with it. This can be from the beginning, or over time. Especially at night it can be a great relief if both parents can take turns.

If mum can let go and enjoy the time for herself without worrying (because of the close bond with the child, this may sometimes take some time), dad can also take over the sleep ritual.

Dads can develop their own routines - babies can distinguish between routines and different caregivers from early on.

Here are a few tips for early bonding for fathers and their children:

• Lying down/reading/singing together with the child

• Skin-to-skin contact

• Walks and exclusive time with the child

• Carry the baby in the carrier

• Bathing/ changing the baby’s nappy

• Using the voice - especially in the and getting used to the child’s nuanced sounds, gestures, and expressions

Sleep, the biggest challenge out there

Hello dear like-minded parents.

Since becoming a mother to a wonderfully vibrant and individual, little human two years ago,  I can say with certainty that the topic of sleep is complicated! It's so complex that it feels like there's a whole sophisticated science behind it. Yet children are little independent people who demand exactly what they need for healthy growth.

I‘m fascinated by this topic, not least because of the many sleepless nights I‘ve had since I became a mum.

You are faced with challenges that you never thought about before, and sleep's probably the biggest one out there. How hard can it be to get a few nights of proper good sleep? (Very hard!) and then when you go searching for sustainable solutions, way too late and exhausted, you stumble upon contradictory suggestions that only make you feel more unsettled and doubtful.

As a student of the Association for Holistic Child Sleep in Germany, I dive deep into the topics surrounding attachment-oriented baby and toddler sleep. I want to use my knowledge and skills to support new parents as well as families with older children, helping them with gentle steps to relaxed nights and daytime naps.

Babies and young children instinctively know exactly what they have to do to survive in the first months. Let’s support them in this without rigid sleep schedules, understanding and adapted expectations. 

I'm based in Tasmania, Australia. I'm looking forward to connecting local, interstate, and international families. 

Let's make bedtime snories together. 

Myths, that simply can't be true

"Aaaaaah, I slept like a baby!"

Who else has heard this association, becauseI know I have - and wondered whether it truly refers to the finest of sleep experiences possible?

Images from films and advertisements have shaped us - the baby is put to bed at 7pm and wakes up at 8am in the best of moods, not a peep in between and pure relaxation for all involved.

But the truth is different and that's a good thing, because, from an evolutionary standpoint, it was even dangerous for babies to fall into a too deep sleep... In a world full of saber-toothed animals, mammoths and other giants, those who slept too deeply would be in dire trouble. To this day, we still carry this instinctual fear with us.

And yet we must never forget that there are also exceptions, and that each child is different.

What other myths have you come across that simply can't be true?

About the early birds and the night owls…

Good news, the early bird often goes to bed easily in the evening!
... but it also gets up early in the morning, in the best mood, to start the day. 

Whether it's 5 am or 6 am, early risers often can't wait.
But how do we as parents deal with the situation, especially when it goes against our own biological rhythm?

The simplest solution probably sounds easier than it is: with a lot of understanding and patience It helps to make the morning as beautiful as possible, especially at Christmas time, you can lie down on the couch, with tea and books, or turn on music and celebrate life! 

If there's anything I've learned from our early riser, it's to make the most of the situation and it's nice to see him especially thrive in the morning when we meet his needs.

Individual sleep duration is part of who we are and just as with adults, toddlers have an individual circadian rhythm. Now, it may be that your child is not necessarily an early riser. Perhaps your child has only recently started getting up early, or has recently been in a bad mood after waking up in the morning?

The formation of the circadian rhythm depends on maturity and develops individual together with the child. If one rhythm works with one child, is doesn’t have to work with yours. Have I mentioned how complex sleep is?!

We'll shed light on all of this in my sleep consultation, which kicks off in just a few weeks. I look forward to helping you have better nights and new bedtime snories.

Common reasons for sleep consultations

• Waking up every hour during the night
• needing the boob to fall asleep and after each wake-up
• tears or too much fun playing in bed
• waking up way too early (early bird) or late bedtimes (night owl)
• nocturnal waking phases
• external pressures
• planning a bigger holiday

Does any of this sound familiar?

During my training as an attachment-oriented sleep consultant, I learned about the sleep development of newborns and toddlers and, above all, learned the needs behind night-time awakenings. 

I know from my own experience how hard it is being incredibly tired, and your thoughts are permanently centred around your child’s sleep with no space for anything else.

New situations and stages of life can be challenging and unfortunately you never know beforehand what’s coming. Just as a baby’s individual sleep - it’s unforeseeable and changes all the time

If you like, check out my selection of consulting packages and feel free to contact me, whenever you’re ready for new bedtime snories.